30 May 2005 (yesterday) (tomorrow)

I'm at the greatest crossroads in my life that I've ever been aware of, and perhaps the key words are "that I've ever been aware of."  For surely the disappointments of the last year, two years, ten years must have sprung from an inability on my part to accurately assess the motives of the people around me and the risks inherent in some of the actions I have taken. 

I have been offered love and squandered it.  I have pursued love and been humiliated over and over.  The latter is the scar of which I am most keenly aware.  It must heal, lest I perish.

Physical scars have amassed as well-- symbols of love affairs.